Abstract

There have been multiple psychological theories on how music affects people’s behaviour during a breakup, but there have been no direct studies examining its neurobiological effects. In order to investigate this topic, this paper synthesises research and multiple studies related to the effects of heartbreak on the neural systems, as well as how music affects these systems. This research paper argues that music may regulate certain systems like the reward system, attachment system and social rejection system that are dysregulated during heartbreak. This paper also acknowledges the limitations music has as a coping strategy regarding maladaptive listening, as well as not being the solution to the underlying cause of the emotional pain. 

1. Introduction

Have you ever found that listening to music has helped you cope with heartbreak? If so, have you wondered why? Coping with the loss of an individual’s romantic interest may vary from person to person, but the neural systems that are triggered while going through heartbreak remain the same. A common coping strategy is listening to music, and there have been multiple psychological studies that examine its use during heartbreak. Some say it is to feel validated, others say it is a distraction, a way to cope with the hardships heartbreak provides. However, the question still remains as to why this is effective biologically. By examining how our brain’s neural systems are affected by heartbreak and how listening to music influences these systems, this paper argues that music, rather than being just a distraction, helps modulate the neural processes involved in heartbreak and regulates them to a more normal state, particularly the reward system, attachment system and social rejection system. 

2. Neural Systems Involved in Heartbreak

Experiencing heartbreak leads to dysregulation in multiple neural systems, including the reward system, attachment system and social rejection system.

2.1 Dopamine and the Reward System

Love is a crucial source of stimulation for the reward system because of the constant release of dopamine. When falling in love, the reward system is activated when encountering the person there is a romantic interest in. The brain releases large amounts of dopamine which stimulates a similar feeling to addiction; however, when going through heartbreak, this dopamine release is interrupted, leading to a sense of withdrawal due to the sudden lack of production (Roy et al., 2025). 

This is where music comes into play by substituting the lost source of dopamine and reward. Music can help make the withdrawal symptoms less prominent because it provides the brain with another source of dopamine release, helping compensate for the loss of the romantic partner. The reason why listening to music releases dopamine is because the brain has the ability to experience pleasure from auditory stimuli such as music. This pleasure is similar to the one experienced in primary and secondary rewards (Ferreri, 2019). This occurs because the brain anticipates certain patterns in a song, making the brain release dopamine out of the satisfaction of predicting correctly or being surprised by a new melody. The brain continues to release dopamine as it learns and memorises the latter. 

2.2 Opioids and the Social Rejection System

When an individual is in love, it is common for them to feel multiple kinds of emotions, one of which is the desire to be accepted by a romantic interest. Consequently, when going through a heartbreak, the social rejection system is triggered, causing feelings of pain. In order to diminish this, the brain releases endogenous opioids; however, if not enough opioids are released, it is much more difficult to emotionally recover.

Music also causes the brain to release opioids. Music could therefore be utilised in reducing the pain caused by romantic loss. While dopamine can be considered as the outcome or reward of listening to music, opioids are what makes listening to music enjoyable and produces an emotional response. In one study, participants underwent fMRI scanning to assess the amount of pleasure and brain activity experienced while listening to music (Pultkien et al., 2025). The study showed how music triggered sectors of the brain known as “hedonic spots”. The study also confirmed the relation of striatal opioid release with experiencing pleasure. This is an important finding because, in another study, it was discovered that when an individual experiences social rejection (which includes heartbreak), the brain releases opioids in order to reduce the emotional pain of rejection. However, being rejected while feeling depressed triggers only a small amount of opioid release, causing the emotional pain to persist (Hsu et al. 2015). This helps explain why listening to music while experiencing rejection is beneficial: music triggers endogenous opioids which help enhance positive emotion and reduce perceived pain.

Therefore, if the opioid system is not naturally triggered by the brain, for a short period of time music can help with opioid production leading to the brain regularising and coping with pain slightly easier. While music will not remove the main source of the pain (in this case, heartbreak), it can make it the healing process feel more manageable.

2.3 Oxytocin and the Attachment System

Love also affects the attachment system. When in love, oxytocin and vasopressin, which are responsible for feelings of attachment towards a romantic interest, remain at high and secure levels as long as there is a maintained interaction with the attachment figure. When a breakup occurs and the individual is separated from the attachment figure, “the system activates the overlapping nervous circuit responsible for the perception of pain, reduces the sensitivity to the reward and increases stress reactions” (Roy et al., 2025). In other words, the attachment system enters “survival mode” and the brain views the loss of the romantic interest as a threat, resulting in a heightened sense of stress and increased difficulty in forming new social relationships after the breakup. 

Oxytocin is known to promote social bonding and love, but when confronted with heartbreak, it may become associated with antisocial behaviours, especially in contexts involving fear or perceived danger. For example, this may be reflected in future romantic relationships since the brain has catalogued the previous experience as painful and/or dangerous. The dysregularisation that occurs after a breakup is caused by the absence of reciprocal oxytocin-releasing reactions, yet music can help regulate this by increasing oxytocin levels, which “contributes to the relaxation effect through activation of the vagal nerve” (Ooishi et al., 2017). Therefore, music reduces the stress that may be felt when going into a new relationship by increasing the oxytocin levels that have been lost once the attachment to the prior romantic interest is gone. This may help the brain to avoid immediately cataloging the new relationship as negative or catastrophic.

Music may encourage social behaviour through the production of oxytocin, but it cannot directly create social relationships or emotional attachments. Its helpfulness lies in accommodating a more relaxed mindset at the thought of a new relationship.

3. Music and Emotional Regulation

While music can help regulate emotions during a heartbreak, it can also be counterproductive depending on the individual. Music can be used as a healthy way of coping for some people, helping to process emotions more easily and reduce stress; for others, it may encourage them to dwell in negative emotions, causing a maladaptive way of coping. During heartbreak, it is important for the individual to not dwell in feelings of rejection and loss, which can be aided by listening to uplifting music. However, if an individual decides to instead listen to songs of rejection and loss, despite helping them feel “validated”, it may lead to repeatedly re-living negative feelings. Since the brain’s current cognitive focus is the loss and negative aspect, it prevents the individual from feeling more positive and uplifting emotions. This process is known as rumination (Carlson et al., 2015).

Listening to certain songs may also trigger past memories, which might be counterproductive depending on the individual. For example, if a couple shared a meaningful song during their relationship, regularly listening to the song after the breakup might cause the brain to remember the positive experiences shared during the relationship. In a maladaptive scenario, this could cause the individual to romanticise the relationship rather than maintaining an unbiased and balanced perspective of the relationship as a whole, increasing the emotional intensity.

As mentioned previously, music has the ability to bring temporary pleasure, aiding the brain in processing emotions with more ease. One study discovered that music triggered the brain to feel pleasure in areas of pain and caused the brain to temporarily reshape the way it was processing pain (Koelsch & Bradt, 2025). It is important to understand that music does not resolve the cause of the heartbreak but rather provides temporary relief. If someone is using music in a maladaptive light and relying too much on temporal pleasure rather than using it as a way to process and heal, the pain may become more prominent over time.

4. Music and Personal Identity

Music can be a useful tool in many aspects when it comes to regulating heartbreak, but may lack in its ability to minimise the loss of personal identity after a breakup. Personal identity is often influenced by the people an individual surrounds themselves with, including a romantic interest. However, once this bond is broken, an individual may be left with a loss of sense of self. During the heartbreak, the individual is forced to overcome this disruption and transform into a new identity. Whether this new identity is the reflection of positive or negative growth depends on each individual (Trembley, 2022).

Despite music being helpful during heartbreak, it may not be as helpful when addressing the loss of personal identity if an individual’s sense of self is heavily tied to their former romantic partner. For example, music might make the individual remember the loss of the identity and the disruption to their sense of self caused by the breakup. This could make the process of healing during heartbreak more difficult. However, it may be a good way to reconnect with the identity the individual had prior to the relationship and use it as the foundation of their new sense of self-identity. Multiple studies have shown that music deeply relates to self-identity since it can remind an individual of memories that contributed to the formation of their identity, reinforcing the individual’s existing sense of self.

5. Conclusion

Despite the lack of research on the neuroscience behind music’s effect on heartbreak, there is evidence that supports a favourable conclusion that music can play a crucial role in the healing process. Music can help regulate certain systems such as the reward system, attachment system and social rejection system by helping with the production of the neurotransmitters that are related to each of these systems. However, it can also be conterproductive to certain individuals because of the maladaptive aspect of it, which may lead to rumination, causing the individual to repeatedly experience the same negative feelings. 

This paper argued that music can provide temporary relief and support recovery, emotional processing and situational adaptation following heartbreak, allowing an individual to move forward more easily. This subject is relatively unexplored and opens up numerous opportunities for future research and discovery. Future experimentation and examination is highly encouraged because not only may it lead to a more direct answer on music’s effects on heartbreak but also improve our understanding on how music influences our brains and how to approach it in a positive manner.

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